Happy Valentine's Day - Friday xoxo
Once upon a time,
I had gone out on two dates with a Costa Rican electrician and then on that Saturday, I asked, “Do you want to go surfing?”
After I surfed solo I walked back to my house and fell asleep. Unwashed. Hungry. Tired.
At midnight, I got up and was so thirsty. But I put on my rain boots and walked down to Rumors for a glass of water. There was this energy that said ~ see if you like the music at Rumors. If you don’t, just come back. No big deal.
I had been through a huge breakup the summer before back in July 2023 and I had practice walking into Rumors alone and confident and always walked directly to the bathroom line.
He saw me before I saw him, I promise.
Because when I got to the bathroom line, Ellie came up and said, “Hi Virginia! Anna is over there and let’s dance!”
So I go pee, grab my water and say hi to Anna the photographer.
After not a long period of time, this person comes up on my left and in Spanish asks, “Do you have a boyfriend?”
I shook my head “no” and that’s when he grabbed my face and kissed me.
haha I remember backing up and talking to him in English - saying something about I came here to dance not to kiss. And then he danced with me. And asked to buy me a beer. I remember how I couldn’t understand what his name was very well. Even though I speak Spanish, there was something about how he spoke that I couldn’t understand him easily.
I assumed he was a surf instructor I just hadn’t met yet.
We danced until the lights came on and then we meandered up the road towards my apartment.
Passing by a low key hostel, he pointed and said, “my stuff is there.” I said, “let’s get it tomorrow.”
If he wanted to he would.
Period.
He knew he was suppose to leave the next day for Nicaragua. He had only arrived in Tamarindo that night. A one night stop on his journey from Columbia towards the United States.
At first, he talked about staying for three days. But that first weekend we went to San Jose for music. And he talked about how he would stay through Halloween.
An eleven day relationship. A containership. An end date.
But within five days of spending time, we talked about spending the month of November together. To see if we could be a relationship. And.
That’s how I met him. And he’s no ones father and this isn’t a sitcom you watch on television.
After leaving my longest relationship of my life so far (and 16 years is a heck of a chunk of time), I never gave up hope that someone would come along and think, “I wonder why she is by herself.” and then have the courage to ask me to my face and wait for my response.
Reflection: There are a lot of people out there folks. Wiggle your toes and find some toes that like wiggling with yours. Find someone that likes to look into your eyes.
Paying attention to your five senses when you are with your “forever” person and love them for who they are. Also ask yourself, “Does the person I spend a lot of time with help me feel better about myself or not better about myself?” Because the person you will be with the absolutely longest is yourself. Not them.
You come first. And I let myself suffer in relationships in my past. And I don’t want to do that anymore. I am interested in taking ownership of my current actions based on all of my experiences of my past.
Which are very different from yours.
Thank you for your support and the light in me, sees and honors the light in you. And that’s the same light we keep shining to each other until we see each other again, which I hope is soon. :)